So basically, at the moment, I'm hurting. But let's not sum things up.

You all know I've been having trouble with my knees, yeah? Severe pain, and they've been giving out. Well the pain's been getting worse and worse, and now, of course, It's extremely difficult to walk or stand. I was late to a few classes Friday (I'm NEVER late), and now I've gone from "Let's walk around uptown!" To taking 1000 milligrams of whatever a night, at least, just to get to sleep. I get to go to a very nice hospital soon, but not soon enough. This friday, hopefully, I will be able to have an appointment at Children's.
But of course, there is more trouble.
My panic attacks have returned. The ones with the chest pain and the severe muscle twitches? Yeah. We're not sure how to treat them without medication, and those kinds of meds have extremely high risks. Our doctor will not give them to me. But at what cost? I cry in pain, twitch to where I can't control anything, and have trouble breathing? I don't know what to do.
Plus of course, we add this. A few nights ago, I was actually working on my history project when, suddenly, my fingers started going numb. Needless to say I took off my wrist brace, tried massaging it, moving it, and it just got worse. I had to drive home to my mom who took me to the hospital. Now my hand gets really pale, tingles, then goes numb on and off, randomly. We're not sure what it is. So now I've got a nice big wrist splint, a knee brace, and a wrist brace.
To top it off, people moved in next door, and I'm becoming more insecure by the day. Suddenly I'm worrying about everything, getting crabby, and even worse, I'm not talking as much! Can you imagine, ME not talking?! Yeah, it's crazy, but true. My best friend, brought it to my attention. I'm withdrawing into my own little miserable world. Not good!
What do I do? I don't know, but I'm lonely here.

~Kathy/Kit/MM